My Congo Sister and a Lesson in Compassion

I wanted to share with you some wonderful news I received just a couple days ago. It is news about my new Congo sister, Zawadi Mande.

You may wonder how I have a Congo sister. I am a sponsor with the wonderful non-profit organization, Women for Women International (WFWI). I have even been fortunate enough to have met in person and briefly talked to the founder of WFWI, Zainab Salbi. This organization allows for sponsors to be matched up with a "sister" in one of nine countries that is effected by war, poverty, and malnutrition. I had chosen the Congo region as I feel drawn to that country, for some reasons that are unknown to me. As part of the sponsorship, you get an informational form about your sister and a small photograph of her.

My sister, Zawadi Mande was born in 1982 and has a common-law marriage. She has given birth to four children, however (and VERY UNFORTUNATELY), one of her little boy's has passed away. Her other children include two girls and another little boy. She also cares for her brother-in-law's two little boys. The form also states that Zawadi has not obtained any education and that they live in a non-residential building being used as a residence. They do not have any electricity and use candles and torches for light. They also don't have any running water and have to count on rivers, lakes, and ponds. My dear Zawadi does work on her family's land/farm, which excites me. However I then learn that her leg often hurts, her family is in poor health and they rarely get timely medical treatment because they cannot afford it. Zawadi also indicates that she has lost other family members to war, violence, or political oppression.

Now, here is where the lesson in compassion comes in. As Zawadi's sponsor sister, I will be providing her with a monthly financial income of approximately $20 US dollars. That will give her enough money to feed her family, get water, pay for education, get any medical treatment they may need, and training on various topics. I have to admit, as a result, I do feel such compassion for my sister Zawadi. I want to help her in so many ways as a fellow person and woman. I love that I am able to directly share and show compassion for another woman in an area of the world that appears to be less fortunate then I am, here in the States.

I have come to notice that feeling compassionate has changed my life in many ways. I feel more connected to others in the world and also more of a sense of peace. I even notice physical changes in my body when I do something compassionate. I feel an aliveness within me and warmth within my hands and feet.

Compassion is a wonderful emotion to experience and share. I ask each of you today to feel and share just a little compassion. Whether it be something small (e.g. holding the door for a stranger) or something more grand (e.g. becoming a sponsor for WFWI). I believe that if we all could just share a little compassion for other people and other living creatures, including our dear planet, then this world would become a more wondrous and peaceful place to live in.

Best wishes to all!

A Story that Warms Your Heart

Hello everyone,

I was sent this story and just loved it. It warmed my heart and soul and I wanted to share it with all of you. The author is unknown to me, but I am grateful that whoever wrote this shared it.

ENJOY!

"As she stood in front of her 5th grade class on the very first day of school, she told the children an untruth. Like most teachers, she looked at her students and said that she loved them all the same. However, that was impossible, because there in the front row, slumped in his seat, was a little boy named Teddy Stoddard.

Mrs. Thompson had watched Teddy the year before and noticed that he did not play well with the other children, that his clothes were messy and that he constantly needed a bath. In addition, Teddy could be unpleasant. It got to the point where Mrs. Thompson would actually take delight in marking his papers with a broad red pen, making bold X's and then putting a big "F" at the top of his papers.

At the school where Mrs. Thompson taught, she was required to review each child's past records and she put Teddy's off until last. However, when she reviewed his file, she was in for a surprise.

Teddy's first grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is a bright child with a ready laugh. He does his work neatly and has good manners... he is a joy to be around.." His second grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is an excellent student, well liked by his classmates, but he is troubled because his mother has a terminal illness and life at home must be a struggle."

His third grade teacher wrote, "His mother's death has been hard on him. He tries to do his best, but his father doesn't show much interest, and his home life will soon affect him if some steps aren't taken."

Teddy's fourth grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is withdrawn and doesn't show much interest in school. He doesn't have many friends and he sometimes sleeps in class."

By now, Mrs. Thompson realized the problem and she was ashamed of herself. She felt even worse when her students brought her Christmas presents, wrapped in beautiful ribbons and bright paper, except for Teddy's. His present was clumsily wrapped in the heavy, brown paper that he got from a grocery bag. Mrs. Thompson took pains to open it in the middle of the other presents. Some of the children started to laugh when she found a rhinestone bracelet with some of the stones missing, and a bottle that was one-quarter full of perfume. But she stifled the children's laughter when she exclaimed how pretty the bracelet was, putting it on, and dabbing some of the perfume on her wrist. Teddy Stoddard stayed after school that day just long enough to say, "Mrs. Thompson, today you smelled just like my Mom used to."

After the children left, she cried for at least an hour. On that very day, she quit teaching reading, writing and arithmetic. Instead, she began to teach children. Mrs. Thompson paid particular attention to Teddy. As she worked with him, his mind seemed to come alive. The more she encouraged him, the faster he responded. By the end of the year, Teddy had become one of the smartest children in the class and, despite her lie that she would love all the children the same, Teddy became one of her "teacher's pets.."

A year later, she found a note under her door, from Teddy, telling her that she was the best teacher he ever had in his whole life.

Six years went by before she got another note from Teddy. He then wrote that he had finished high school, third in his class, and she was still the best teacher he ever had in life.

Four years after that, she got another letter, saying that while things had been tough at times, he'd stayed in school, had stuck with it, and would soon graduate from college with the highest of honours. He assured Mrs. Thompson that she was still the best and favourite teacher he had ever had in his whole life.

Then four more years passed and yet another letter came. This time he explained that after he got his bachelor's degree, he decided to go a little further. The letter explained that she was still the best and favourite teacher he ever had. But now his name was a little longer.... The letter was signed, Theodore F. Stoddard, MD.

The story does not end there. You see, there was yet another letter that spring. Teddy said he had met this girl and was going to be married. He explained that his father had died a couple of years ago and he was wondering if Mrs. Thompson might agree to sit at the wedding in the place that was usually reserved for the mother of the groom. Of course, Mrs. Thompson did. And guess what? She wore that bracelet, the one with several rhinestones missing. Moreover, she made sure she was wearing the perfume that Teddy remembered his mother wearing on their last Christmas together.

They hugged each other, and Dr. Stoddard whispered in Mrs. Thompson's ear, "Thank you Mrs. Thompson for believing in me. Thank you so much for making me feel important and showing me that I could make a difference."

Mrs. Thompson, with tears in her eyes, whispered back. She said, "Teddy, you have it all wrong. You were the one who taught me that I could make a difference. I didn't know how to teach until I met you."

(For you that don't know, Teddy Stoddard is the Dr. at Iowa Methodist in Des Moines that has the Stoddard Cancer Wing.)

Warm someone's heart today. . . pass this along. I love this story so very much, I cry every time I read it. Just try to make a difference in someone's life today? tomorrow? Just "do it". Random acts of kindness, I think they call it!"

Hope you have a warm and fuzzy day today.

It’s that time of year for “Spring Cleaning”….Mental Spring Cleaning that is.

For most people, Spring is finally in the air. I for one am happy to see that Mother Nature has decided to finally pay attention to our calendar and share with us some of her “warmer” gifts. Such as sunny warm breezes and refreshing rainfalls, versus blistery winds and falling snowflakes. I can see the beauty of buds forming on the trees and several birds singing to the sunrise. Now, speaking of Spring time....one of the things that most people think about and plan for is spring cleaning. In most cases, that means cleaning our houses, yards, and closets. However, I would like to share with you another form of “spring cleaning” that I personally conduct every season on myself. A form of mental spring cleaning.

Just as dust accumulates in our homes over time, our minds can collect “dust” so to speak. This “dust” can fog our minds and prevent us from thinking as clearly as a crystal blue Caribbean ocean. One of the most common thoughts we have, which seems to fog our mind up, is our ability to realize that we have full control of our actions and our lives. Many people tend to give up control in two major ways. The first is giving up control to circumstance, and the other is giving up control to another person.

Some examples of giving up control to circumstance include: “I can’t go to your party”, “I have to go to the store”, and “I should clean the house”. Even I have used these excuses myself from time to time. However, I realized that they left me feeling powerless. In reality, and unless someone is actually threatening you bodily harm, more empowering phrases would include “I choose to”, “I won’t be”, “I am going to”, and “I will”.

Examples of giving up control to another person include: “I want James to love me more”, “I want my company to give me a raise”, and “I want Casey to admit he was wrong”. In every single one of these examples, the control of the outcome is given to someone else. Leaving a person to feel helpless and even victimized. More empowering phrases would include: “I want to feel more love”, “I want to make more money”, and “I want to believe I did the right thing”. The more empowering statements can give someone a clearer picture to the problem and as a result, a clear solution may surface. In addition, the control is not given to a specific person or organization. Someone may realize that there may be several ways and options to receive what they desire or need.

In conclusion, I would encourage you to mentally “spring clean” your mind, as well as your home or yard. The following tip can help you to get started today.

Mental Spring Cleaning Exercise:

1. Write down a list of “I can’t” statements you have.

2. Now look to your left and right to see if someone is
threatening you bodily harm. If not, move onto #3.

3. Re-write the statements to read “I choose not to”.

4. Review both lists to see which one leaves you
feeling more empowered and less helpless.

ENJOY....and BEST WISHES TO ALL!

I Think....Therefore I Am.....NOT!

Hello to all,

In the last few weeks I have been aware of, and practicing, a realization from my studies with spiritual teacher, Eckhart Tolle. This realization has allowed me to feel more awakened, more enlightened, and more at peace. Naturally, I wanted to share this with all of you.

I use to love the famous quote by the philosopher, Descartes, "I think, therefore I am". However, my recent realization has led me to question this ever famous quote. I think a more appropriate quote would read "I think...therefore I am human", or an even more enlightened person may say "I think...therefore I am experiencing life through a human form".

Regardless of where you fall, or what you believe, nearly every single one of us thinks. Also, most people today believe that everything we do and feel requires us to "think". For example, when we wake up in the morning many of us may think about how we just slept, or how our new day will begin. During the day, we may think about how the morning went, what we got done, or didn't get done. Then many of us may think about how the evening will go and what plans we have, if any. In the evening we may think about how our entire day went, and how our evening will finish up.

Thinking is a function of our minds and I truly have come to believe that thinking is something that happens to us as human beings, and not something that "is" us. For instance, I know someone who is interviewing for a new job. They had received a call from a Recruiter who wanted to set up an in-person interview. The Recruiter was impressed with the candidate's resume and as a result felt they might be a good fit for the company. The candidate was interested, however they were leery of the drive, and rightfully so. They expressed this to the Recruiter, but also mentioned that they would like to set up the in-person interview. However, when the candidate called back with a date and time, they got the Recruiter's voice-mail and left a message. As time began to pass, and no call was received, the candidate started to think about the Recruiter and the call over and over again. Their mind just went into worry-mode. They started to doubt the Recruiter's interest and then they even started to doubt their own abilities. The candidates thoughts went from "I am an impressive candidate" to "I may not be good enough for the job after all".

Now, in reality this same candidate had gotten many accolades for their work and even won an "Employee of the Quarter" award. In fact, if you really want to get deep into the scientific explanations, physicists state that in reality we are all made up of billions and billions of atoms, which further boils down to energy.

Never the less, it is when we start to believe in our negative and compulsive thoughts that we get into trouble. However, if we truly see thinking as a function that occurs to us as humans, and not who we truly are in reality, then we can free ourselves from some of the limited prison walls that our thinking minds have enclosed around us from years of unconditioned labeling.

Please take the time, as often as possible, to do the following exercise. This exercise will help you to see that thinking is a function that you can use as a powerful tool versus believing that you are what you think.

Free your identity from your thoughts exercise:

1) Start to begin to listen to your thinking mind, possibly a voice inside your head that judges, complains, compares, likes, dislikes, and speculates.

2) Become aware, or the watcher, of your mind and thoughts.

3) Pay special attention to those thoughts that are repetitive.

4) Try not to judge those thoughts, just notice them.

5) As you notice the thoughts, some of them may begin to weaken and lose their power since you are not feeding them with more thoughts or identifying with them.

6) A deep feeling of presence from within you may then arise and you may feel a true sense of joy and peace.

Please be patient with yourself when doing this exercise. Over time, you should see and feel a shift happen deep within you.

ENJOY......AND PEACE TO ALL!

Who is your "Everybody"?

Hello everyone,

I wanted to share another simple, yet effective, tool that can help you to realize who your "everybody" truly is.

Many people will talk in generalizations and one of the most popular generalizations we use from time to time is our "everybody" line. For example, I use to catch myself either saying or internally thinking "oh well everybody I know does this"....or "Everybody will think this way of me".....and the list goes on. Some people have used this line so many times that they don't even realize they are using it. The unfortunate thing about that, is how destructive that can be.

Some people may internally torment themselves for days and even year after an embarrassing event, or unfortunate mistake. For example, some may say to themselves, "I can't believe I did that, everyone laughed at me", or "Everyone thinks I'm an idiot for saying what I said". Then, what is even more unfortunate are those thousands of dreams or wishes that some people have not pursued or were left unfulfilled all because of their fear of "what everybody will think" of them.

Now, if we all took just a little time to actually think about and write down who our "everybody" is....my guess is that, like me, your list will be infinitely small. Please take the time to do the following exercise, preferably on a daily basis. The results over time will help you to free yourself from the internal fear of what "everyone" will do or think of you.

Free from your "Everybody" exercise:

1. Write down who you actually think about when you think or say "everybody".

2. Look the list over again and write down an actual example of a time that each person did say, or do, something that left you feeling hurt or conditional.

3. Make a new list of just those people who actually said, or did, something to you that was hurtful or conditional.

4. Now, think of the millions of people who exist in the world, in your country, in your state, in your town. Realize that your list does not actually include everybody in the world, or even everybody in your town.

5. Repeat this every time you find yourself either thinking or saying "I can't because of what everybody will think".

Best wishes to all and have a safe weekend!

If We Were a Global Village

I was sent a very interesting presentation that I felt moved enough to share with all of you.

"If you could fit the entire population of the world into a village consisting of 100 people, maintaining the proportions of all the people living on Earth, that village would consist of:

57 Asians

21 Europeans

14 Americans (North, Central and South)

8 Africans

There would be:

52 women and 48 men

30 Caucasians and 70 non-Caucasians

89 heterosexuals and 11 homosexuals

6 people would possess 59% of the wealth and they would all come from the USA

80 would live in poverty

70 would be illiterate

50 would suffer from hunger and malnutrition

1 would be dying

1 would be being born

1 would own a computer

1 (yes, only one) would have a university degree

If we looked at the world in this way, the need for acceptance and understanding would be obvious. But consider again the following:

If you woke up this morning in good health, you have more luck than one million people, who won't live through the week.

If you have never experienced the horror of war, the solitude of prison, the pain of torture, were not close to death from starvation, then you are better off then 500 million people.

If you can go to your place of worship without fear that someone will assault or kill you, then you are luckier than 3 billion (that's right) people.

If you have a full fridge, clothes on your back, a roof over your head, and a place to sleep, you are wealthier than 70% of the world's population.

If you currently have money in the bank, in your wallet, and a few coins in your purse, you are one of 8 of the privileged few amongst the 100 people in the world.

If your parents are still alive and still married, you're a rare individual.....

And so?

WORK like you don't need the money.

LOVE like nobody has ever hurt you.

DANCE like nobody is watching.

SING like nobody is listening.

LIVE as if this was paradise on Earth."

Please feel free to share this with many others whom you care and love.

Best always!

Shannon

Struggling with a Personal Change? Do as Turtles Do.

Recently I have heard many people say that they are trying to make some sort of change. However, in most cases, making a change is no simple task. In fact, most people end up not changing the very thing they set out to change. This has left many people feeling frustrated, hopeless, and with a sense of having failed. Some people are trying to change a physical aspect of their body. For example, several people have mentioned that they are trying to lose weight and eat a healthier diet. While others may be trying to change a characteristic or an aspect of their personality, such as becoming more optimistic or having more patience.

Now, as much as I would love to say I have a PhD from the University of Change, I myself have struggled with change. A few years ago I woke up to a bloated belly. I brushed it off as “that time of month” or “I must have ate something that wasn’t off the American Heart Association List”. However, I realized two weeks later, that this bloated belly had taken up permanent residence on my body. Another change I had struggled with was my sense of patience. I had prided myself on having patience, however, after about one minute of being in a traffic jam, I was ready to become Rambo and blow everyone out of my way. Thus, I had decided I wanted to drop the bloated belly and become much more patient.

At first I jumped right in with both feet. I thought to myself, “OK we are going to exercise every day for 2 hours and then I will take deep breaths while driving and be very patient”. I thought it was that simple. Like the flip of a switch. However, about three days later, I was cursing at the treadmill after five minutes of jogging, and I was honking my car horn at the last daredevil who cut me off. What did I do wrong? Why hadn’t my new changes taken hold?

Then I realized it was because I had not taken “Turtle Steps” as part of my transformation. One of my mentor’s, Martha Beck, had introduced me to “Turtle Steps”. The premise is pretty simple, and extremely effective. All that someone needs to do is come up with a change they want to make, and then turn it into a goal. Then they take that goal and cut it in half. Then take that goal, and cut it in half again. Do this until the goal feels ridiculously easy. So I tried the Turtle Steps theory and cut my goal in half, again, again and again until something in me clicked. I felt a sense of, “Oh yes, we can do that for sure”. So I set out to accomplish my new goal, and not only did I keep up the regime for months, but I also was enjoying that time. So the next time you find yourself seeking to make a change, set up Turtle Steps and then hold on to your seat.

Turtle Steps to Successful Change:

1. Create a goal you want to accomplish.
2. Now cut that goal in half, and then in half again.
3. Continue until the goal is ridiculously easy.

4. Implement that easy goal for at least four days.

Best wishes and peace to all always!!